Happy 2012 everyone! This has been a very unique new years for me and I’ve been thinking a lot about this idea of New Year’s resolutions. I’ve made my fair share of them and have followed through on a … few. A lot of people think New Year’s resolutions are silly, that making such a big deal out of celebrating the New Year is ridiculous. Now, I’ve never been the first one to pop the bubbly or throw the confetti, but I do consider new years a very special time. In its purist form it is the recognition of the end of one section of time and the celebration of the start of another. But, too many it represents hope and starting off on a new foot, almost like a “do-over”. This idea of a fresh start leads many to make resolutions, things they want to accomplish in the New Year ahead. But, this year, moving from 2011 to 2012 I think I will instead list out the lessons that I learned in 2011. After all, if we don’t learn from the past, we will only repeat our mistakes in the future…
I have learned a lot during my time in South Africa, things that I’m sure I would have learned at some point or another in my journey to adulthood but it seems that this YAGM experience has just sped that process along. I have learned a great deal about myself and how I handle being outside of my comfort zone, I have learned a lot about my faith and how to express it, and I have been able to learn a great deal about people in general and the strength of the human spirit.
One of the great lessons I have learned over the course of 2011 and here in South Africa is how to forgive. I’ve never been a person who gets really angry all the time. There are things that bother me sure and if someone hurts my family or my friends that tends to get my blood boiling. But, overall I consider myself an even tempered person with a very long fuse. The problem with this is that when someone does hurt me, it’s usually pretty bad and I find it hard to forgive. Well, early in my time here I heard a sermon that changed that, it was a sermon about forgiveness. The pastor said that the person who was wronged should always be the first to forgive. It sounds simple right? As simple as that sounds, that message hit me like a ton of bricks. Normally when you are hurt by someone your thought is, “well, if they apologize first then maybe I’ll forgive them” you expect them to see their error and come to you first and then maybe you’ll consider forgiveness. But, what this pastor was saying was that the person who was wronged should approach the person who hurt them and say “you’ve hurt me… but I forgive you”. Talk about being the bigger person right?? A perfect example of this is Nelson Mandela. After 27 years in prison and a lifetime of oppression he walked out of his cell and the first thing he did was look at his jailors and say “I forgive you, now let’s fix this” (ok, so those weren’t his exact words, but you get the picture). That is incredible to me! So, this lesson in forgiveness is something that I have learned from 2011 and will now carry over into 2012. Forgive.
My country coordinator Brian gave me the best advice I’ve ever gotten, and I don’t think he even realized it. And I know that many other people have tried to get this into my head, but it took the right circumstance and the right words for me to put these pieces together. The lesson I learned was this, never rely on anyone else to make you happy, take control of how you feel every day. I was having a conversation with Brian about some struggles I was having day to day here at the beginning of my time in South Africa, and in the middle of my pity party Brian says, “you know, for someone who likes to take control of things you sure do allow others to control your daily happiness”. My first reaction was, “what?! How can you say that!” haha but then I calmed down and I realized he was 100% right. I doubt he realizes how much him saying that got me thinking about so much more than just my attitude here in South Africa but really my attitude about life. I can honestly say that after a lot of self reflection after that conversation I decided to take control over how happy I would be everyday and it has made a huge difference! My experience here has done a 180 degree turn since that conversation. Now, obviously there are factors to personal happiness, your relationships, your surroundings, and the people you love (there’s no way to discount how much those things can affect your life and how you live it) but when the rubber hits the road there is only one person who can make you truly happy and that’s you. So try something for me, wake up every morning and tell yourself, “today will be a good day” and I guarantee that it will be. So far, it’s working for me…
The last lesson of 2011 is one of appreciation. You can’t imagine how much 10,000 miles can make you appreciate what you have. I have always been grateful for everything that I have been blessed with. But, I don’t think that I really understood what I have going for me. I’m going to be honest with you I have the best group of family and friends in the world. I don’t tell them enough how much I love them. So, PAY ATTENTION FAMILY AND FRIENDS… I’m telling you now, I LOVE YOU! I can say that I am one of the luckiest people to have the parents that I have, they are two incredible people. Even though they can get under my skin like all parents do they made me the person that I am and they have supported me through everything that I have set my mind too. You name it, finishing high school in my hometown: done, going to my dream school despite expenses: done, going to Africa for a year and leaving behind two cats, a storage room full of stuff, and student loans: done. And even though we didn’t see eye to eye on every decision, I can’t complain because no matter how big the fight at the end of the day they were still behind me. My whole family is great, I could sit here and talk about how each one of them has made my life better and has supported me, but that would be a very, very long blog. So, to all my amazing family; thank you, I love you. As if I wasn’t lucky enough having the family that I do, I have been beyond blessed to have the most amazing friends. I mean, your family has to love you out of obligation right?? You’re stuck with them… but my friends have supported and loved me by choice, and I am so thankful for that. If you’re reading this and wondering “I wonder if she’s talking about me?” don’t worry… I am talking about you. To all my friends, thank you for choosing to love me and thank you for letting me be a part of your life, I love you! (did I mention that I love you?)
Now, of course there have been other lessons learned this year, like always carry an umbrella, how to fill out loan deferment forms, and vegetable oil will never taste like olive oil… but I thought the ones above were a little bit more important. So, thank you 2011, thank you for teaching me these valuable lessons, I had to go through a lot to learn them, but if you know me you know that I usually take the long way around. I will take these lessons and carry them over in to 2012, the lessons to forgive, be happy, and to appreciate the amazing people in my life. So, bring it on 2012! I’m ready for you!
